Toenails to diets. I can cover it all. Watch out Geraldo, I'm after your job.

I've lost my toenail clippers and I really want to find them. I also want to find a bottle of toenail polish remover. Maybe I should just use the gift certificate that has been in my wallet for over a year and have someone else make my toes look better. If my toenails were people, they would be hippies. Unkempt, wild and free, colorful and a little sketchy around the corners. I want my toes to be upper-middle class. Uniform, tidy, clean and rather boring.

Confession: I'm quite pleased with myself for making an amusing association between my toenails and people. I even giggled a little with a hint of self-glorification. (fyi: apparently self-glorification is a real word. I thought I made that up. Tricky English language)

I've mentioned before that the once euphoric high of used books has gradually worn away for me after working in a used bookstore for so long.... and I wonder if I could twist that around and make a fad diet off of the idea. Addicted to food? Go work in a restaurant for a year and a half. Better yet, go work at a fast-food chain for a month and see how much you crave all that grease and all those warm, delicious, crunchy french fries..... (I just got a huge craving for some fries... dang it!)

After being around the object of your desire, day in and day out, and working with it constantly, and seeing it in all its glory and ruin, you're bound to get over it and find food passe. If not, then you've probably gained 500 lbs and now are a candidate for "the biggest loser" and you can chronicle your demise to salads and cardio on national television. For the greater good, I'm sure.

I don't think this type of "reverse psychology" would work for alcoholics or drug addicts, though. Some people might view that as feeding the need rather than starving it out. Ha. It's pretty ironic to use a food analogy.... Well, obviously food addictions are different....

Anyway... Chase is coming home soon, so I'm going to finish here. I gots lots more stuff to do... Namely stare into Chase's adoring blue eyes. ahhhh. delighful.